I Found Love

I Found Love

 

 

No, this is not what you’re thinking.  I’m not here to tell you about a new boyfriend in my life, and I’m not here to tell you that “Jesus is my bf!” I have entered a season in life where it’s very common for friends of mine to feel like they need a boyfriend/girlfriend; and there’s nothing wrong with wanting this.  Needing this, however, is a different story.  As I see people feeling depressed and unwanted simply because they don’t have a date to prom a significant other, it really bothers me.  When it comes down to it, we all want to be loved.  Romantically, respectfully, and admirably. However, somewhere along the way we have distorted this romantic love into a necessity for fulfillment.  Love is something we need, yes, but a boyfriend/girlfriend is not the only way to happiness and fulfillment.

The truth: You are loved.

Before dipping into the Word, can I remind you of something?  There are people who deeply love and care about you.  For some of us, this may mean our parents, others; a close friend or mentor.  Sure, this love is not romantic.  However, it is something we must cherish.  When it comes down to it, I’m a selfish, mistake-making, imperfect individual.  Yet I am loved.

Too often, we take a single person and label them as “unloved” or “undesirable” simply because of a relationship status.  Sounds silly, but I see people do it every day! In reality, a relationship status is rather irrelevant to the great value every person has.  And nothing demonstrates the value of every individual better than what God did for us.

We all know it, but just in case you forgot…

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16

When you think about it, giving up a son is a huge sacrifice.  When I think of the people closest to me, I wonder if I could sacrifice like God did.  Nonetheless, He must have found us pretty important to give up the one dearest to Him.

The truth: Love is something exciting and fun, not something meant to tear you down.

In the beginning of Genesis, we observe that God created man, then created woman. As God says, “It’s not good for the Man to be alone; I’ll make him a helper, a companion.” God gave us the opportunity of this close companionship with a significant other, but He never states the necessity for this gift.  God will meet all our needs (Isaiah 41:10), romantic love is just a little bonus ;). So it’s not the end of the world if you don’t have that “special someone.”

The truth: Love is not meant for your decoration, but is a dedication; a declaration.

Often times, we want a boyfriend/girlfriend because they spice up our life.  They make us happy, they boost our self-esteem, or they improve our image.  But really, is that what love is about at all? 

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵ It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.⁸ Love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

When we search for love (romantically, or NOT romantically) in the ways the Bible describes, we find something entirely different than the butterflies or confidence we may receive from a so-called “decoration.”  Rather, we may recognize the people placed in our lives that have given us this great gift.  We recognize the gift of love God has given us. 

So truthfully, I have found love.  Whether or not romantic love comes, I have been blessed with love that’s far more fulfilling than any relationship.  God loved me so much, that He took the time to create me.  He made the sacrifice of His son to die for me.  And he did the same for you. Now that is love.

-Tamara

Sour Apple

Sour Apple

 

 

So I think it’s safe to assume that as human beings, we’ve all had a family member or friend do something or say something that just downright infuriates us.  I’m going to be real here and admit…when people make a mistake I’m not quick to get over it.  In fact, it’s one of the greatest challenges I face.  As I have gone through many experiences of this crippling anger, however, I begin to wonder if it’s really worth it.  When it comes down to it, my anger solves nothing.  Not only does it keep me from the joy God has for me, but it also seeps into the lives of others, pulling them down as well.

Although letting things go is something very difficult to do, I’ve found that holding onto them is actually a lot more painful.  The process of releasing your anger and forgiving has an end, whereas resentment and bitterness can tear you apart until there’s nothing left but a “sour apple.”  We’ve all met that person, the one who manages to pick out every single negative thing in life.  As I examine my own life, I see the risk of getting to that point.  Now I’m not there yet, but even if I was…there is always time to turn it all around. As you read on, I encourage you to examine your own life and come alongside me in a challenge to rid yourself of the “sourness.”

The truth: Anger can destroy you.

For man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires. James 1:20

Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil.  Psalm 37:8

A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly. Proverbs 14:29

Yikes, these are only a couple of the many verses I found on this topic.  I’m going to go ahead and conclude that anger is something that must NOT be disregarded.  It has the potential to lead one into bad behavior and sin.  Not only that, but the choice to be angry is a deliberate decision to go against the righteous will God has for our lives.

The truth: Judgment and correction are taken care of by God.

Romans 14:10-12 (MSG):

So where does that leave you when you criticize a brother? And where does that leave you when you condescend to a sister? I’d say it leaves you looking pretty silly—or worse. Eventually, we’re all going to end up kneeling side by side in the place of judgment, facing God. Your critical and condescending ways aren’t going to improve your position there one bit. Read it for yourself in Scripture:

“As I live and breathe,” God says,
“every knee will bow before me;
Every tongue will tell the honest truth
that I and only I am God.”

So tend to your knitting. You’ve got your hands full just taking care of your own life before God.

So in the end, those who have hurt you are accountable for what they did.  Leave it to God to judge them, because it’s not our responsibility to “punish” the ones who hurt us.  Another point to take note of in this scripture is the statement that “all will face judgment.”  Ironically, we often try to attack those who have harmed us, when our anger towards them is also sinful (and will be judged by God) (Matthew 5:22.)  In a sense, doesn’t that make us just as guilty? Just a thought…

The truth: A constant attitude of forgiveness affects every aspect of life. 

Do not say, “I will repay evil”; wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you. Proverbs 20:22

Just as anger/resentment can infect each element of your life, an attitude of forgiveness has the power to refresh and restore.  There’s a freedom that comes along with the decision to forgive, and this deliverance opens a door to whatever God may have in store for your life. When I think about it, there are probably several opportunities of spiritual growth I’ve missed simply because of sulking in my own bitterness. Anger is such a hindrance to growth, and its tight grip can pull us away from God’s plan. When it comes down to it, we can do one of two things: allow the grip of anger and bitterness to dictate our lives; or let it go and move forward.

What will you choose?

-Tamara